My subconscious is a massive pain in the ass

[missdiane]

Since late last week, my brain is trying to convince me that I'm having a heart attack. I know consciously that it's anxiety. I've been through this before multiple times, been checked and scanned and they haven't found an issue but good GRIEF the brain just won't knock it the hell off and I don't need medical bills for the brain being fussy and attention-seeking.

I have headaches. Yeah, I also have puffy sinuses and morning post nasal drip due to chronic sinusitis so explains that. Sometimes pressing on the pressure points helps so see brain? It's not a tumah.
I have neck and shoulder pain and left arm numbness. Well guess what? If I alternate ice and heat on my outrageously knotted trapezius, I get relief for a while. Heat packs and ice packs on the shoulder/neck don't cure heart attacks, brain.
I get occasional minor twinges on the outer left under the boob. Yeah, well see all the other things and also back issues, hypermobility, scoliosis.
BP is a bit elevated but within range (elevated due to stress and anxiety, obviously.)
O2 levels are 98-99%. Pulse totally normal. I mean really.

I'm FINE...well, somewhat.

Yes, I have an appointment with my GP on Feb 1 since I'm just about out of BP meds. I know there'll probably be a recommendation to get a cardiologist again but that takes a while. So in the meantime, GP and I will chat about stuff and I'll ask her to do some extra checks but great googly moogly the brain is one annoying organ. HONESTLY.

Comments

[halfmoon_mollie1]

You are streets ahead knowing that your body is trying to trick you.

I know THAT's a lot of help. Not.

[missdiane]

Definitely a “fool me once” situation.

Though I really wish my brain weren’t being one of those dudes that don’t know shit trying to mansplain my body to me.

[halfmoon_mollie1]

what about antianxiety meds? or perhaps you already take them, and I'm just sounding dumb.

[missdiane]

The challenge there is trying to find one that doesn’t give me bad side effects that are worse than the anxiety itself. I’ve tried several. Xanax works great but you’re not supposed to take that long term so I only do it when it’s an absolute panic attack or I haven’t slept well in some time.

This goes in waves, and it’s like a flareup of any other physical thing that I’m just hoping I can keep the worst of it at bay until the brain chemistry settles down. I do really need to see if my former talk therapist is available and also do things like meditation and other Non-chemical solutions

[halfmoon_mollie1]

yes, those last solutions sound viable.

[missdiane]

Also, who knew hot showers relieve heart attacks? 🙄🙄 Shoulder currently feeling better (the trapezius ache will come back when I tense up but relief for now)

[halfmoon_mollie1]

I will write tht down for future reference!

[threecee]

Sounds like your body is fine. Your mind not so much, but with all it has been through lately, it has a right to be cranky.

[missdiane]

I kind of knew that this was going to happen at some point since I've been internalizing everything but BOY is it annoying.