Life is a combination of magic and pasta.

Thankfully, sister and brother-in-law were able to FaceTime again tonight since it was really clear how close it was. He couldn’t talk, but he really was trying and we kept telling him it was OK and that we know. And then a little while ago, my sister gave me the call to let me know that he had passed.

It hurts, but I’m just so glad he is not struggling anymore because you could just see the pain on his face even though he was already on the good drugs.

This has been the oddest time of my entire life. I mean losing a parent is obviously the biggest...you'd think. Some of what's going on I'm not sure about sharing just yet.

But anyway. We're looking at moving Dad to an assisted living place that does take medicaid pending and medicaid. However it's private pay until you're approved so we'd have to pay whatever his social security doesn't pay for. I think around $2500/month. However, Sis is going to start filling out forms for a place she and the BIL toured yesterday since aside from the money factor, we can't think of much of a downside. It would be closer to both where Sis works and where they live and give Dad far more freedom, his own space guaranteed to ONLY be his own and he'd not have to deal with meals/meds/housekeeping since they do have the 24 hour care. It's also a privately owned place that's been around since 2002 with from what we can find, fabulous reviews. Also, Sis commented that if she got a break at work, she could just roll down the street for a visit or when he needs something. She sent me a little video of what might be able to become his space (see LJ if you want to watch all 12 seconds, it's not posting here)

They haven't completely cleared the old apartment yet so they could move many things that would make it feel SO much more like home to him. He has a full size mattress and box spring but for some reason no frame? But we're thinking it might work better if we just bought him a decent twin bedframe and mattress because then he'd have room for his rocking recliner to watch TV and maybe his little desk to put the laptop we got him previously. They look to have plenty of activities and encourage independence.

He is THRILLED at the idea and I swear if he could, he'd pack up and move today. Also because we think that they might not be fixing the landlines where he's currently at. Possibly not for any of the residents. WTF? That is insane. If they thought the old farts were cranky before, keep them from getting hold of their family and friends. Super smart move. Thankfully Dad can use the prepaid cell enough to call Sis and I. I guess I'll have to send the number to the brother (via messaging the niece) but we're reluctant since even the other day when Dad called the brother back, the brother was giving Dad the bullshit that Mom was "fine." Dude, IN WHAT FANTASY WORLD? She's not been "fine" for many years and has been in very poor health for well over a year. I swear he's in some sort of la la land from years of abuse from his wife and just can't deal with reality. But Sis and I do NOT like that he upsets Dad with this rhetoric.

Since all that is happening, Sis and BIL are wisely NOT coming over for Thanksgiving day weekend and instead are going to try to come around Christmas time. I know they want a NYC visit and that's fine and they are at least willing to come to me in NJ to have a short visit and meal. They still haven't received the death certificates yet so also best to delay until those are in hand.

Meanwhile in other more mundane-ish goings on, my left knee that I frequently tape and have to be careful with started hurting like HELL yesterday out of the blue even when taped. No clue what set it off but I've been using the cane and babying it. I'm still determined to get to Ikea with Emily on Wednesday so will bring the cane and take plenty of breaks. I did want to make beer bread but I may delay that until tomorrow morning.

Also, since I found out that the main road is closed today from 10:30-noon for a Veterans Day parade today, I took off yesterday afternoon and drove down to check out couches at La-Z-Boy. My yearrrrrrrs-old IKEA Ektorp couch that I sleep on is starting to sag and creak a bit too much(one day I'll be able to get a full size daybed frame and get my bedroom moved around so I can sleep in my bed...one day...). I've not purchased any furniture in MANY years so I thought it's time for the investment and they had Veterans Day big sales this week. I gave all the stationary couches the sit/lie test many times and settled on one. While I waited for the sales gal to finish with another couple, I wandered around the recliners since I'd thought about getting one of those for years and was curious. I saw one that was small and sat in it and as the sales gal said "Yeah, I saw that smile." Even though it wasn't big, it was SO comfy and even better, it was on clearance! So I got that too. Yeah, I spent a pretty penny but I needed these. I was going to get the couch in whatever beige/tan was available for no extra but since the recliner was a darker gray with a hint of blue, for no more cost, I'm getting the couch in a navy tone. Unfortunately it's going to take 8-12 weeks to get. I could have the recliner sooner but I figured lets traumatize the kitties with visitors just once. Seems that furniture is still affected by former lockdown delays and hasn't quite caught up yet. Also, they'll take my current couch out to the curb/dumpster which was the other reason I chose La-Z-Boy along with the known quality.

Hope y'all are having nice, quiet, NORMAL weekends