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Those of you that have been putting up with me for a while know about my previously shitty director who was as bad as my current shitty director at ignoring pretty much everything I sent. I would grit my teeth when others would say that I need to understand that he's dealing with a lot with his family, particularly his very elderly mother. Yeah, maybe if it didn't go on for years and years and if he didn't fulfill his obligations to other people he worked with. If it was too much for him, he should have stepped back down to faculty long before he actually did.
So fast forward to more recently where I've been gently poking him for more than eight months to renew his project. I wanted to get it going before it expired at the end of September so there wouldn't be a gap in funding but he just kept dragging his feet. I sent a bulk reminder yesterday to him and other faculty with pending projects and I got an email back from the business person in the Plant Bio department that it might be "a while" before he responds because his mother finally died (at 99) the other day. Ok, fine, though I was now getting agitated since I knew the sympathy train was coming again and that train is longer for some people and sometimes and engine and a caboose for others.
Today I get an email from the person that was my temporary boss until Bosslady came along to a slew of people letting us all know about the death of his mother and on and on.
I got upset then and thankfully it was time for me to head home for lunch. Because aside from Elaine going around and getting people to weigh in on my sympathy card (mostly in Elaine's handwriting) and I suspect she (and maybe a couple of scant others) chipped in for a small gift basket and donation to the meals on wheels, no one knew anything. I was given no grace, no time, no understanding that it might be a bit for me to get back to things. I got my 3 contracted days of bereavement leave and then it was "Good, you're back. So sorry to hear about your mom, so about this thing I need..."
I'd also chalk it up to faculty being held on a higher pedestal than staff - which does happen - but the week after I returned, I was included on a building/campus wide email about a staff member in the offices below mine losing a family member and for everyone to keep them in your thoughts and donate to them. Hell, I'd never even heard of the person that works downstairs.
My circle at work of anyone who knows or gives two shits about me wouldn't even fill up the seats in my compact car if I drove. But hey, I'm just there to work. I'm just the useful tool that is just the expert at her job when it suits you to give me backhanded compliments about how the place would collapse if I weren't there.
And one day I'll find a better job. I need to stick around another 4 or so years to get the full 25 years for retirement eligibility. Hell, I'm tempted to apply to a position down in Camden.
So fast forward to more recently where I've been gently poking him for more than eight months to renew his project. I wanted to get it going before it expired at the end of September so there wouldn't be a gap in funding but he just kept dragging his feet. I sent a bulk reminder yesterday to him and other faculty with pending projects and I got an email back from the business person in the Plant Bio department that it might be "a while" before he responds because his mother finally died (at 99) the other day. Ok, fine, though I was now getting agitated since I knew the sympathy train was coming again and that train is longer for some people and sometimes and engine and a caboose for others.
Today I get an email from the person that was my temporary boss until Bosslady came along to a slew of people letting us all know about the death of his mother and on and on.
I got upset then and thankfully it was time for me to head home for lunch. Because aside from Elaine going around and getting people to weigh in on my sympathy card (mostly in Elaine's handwriting) and I suspect she (and maybe a couple of scant others) chipped in for a small gift basket and donation to the meals on wheels, no one knew anything. I was given no grace, no time, no understanding that it might be a bit for me to get back to things. I got my 3 contracted days of bereavement leave and then it was "Good, you're back. So sorry to hear about your mom, so about this thing I need..."
I'd also chalk it up to faculty being held on a higher pedestal than staff - which does happen - but the week after I returned, I was included on a building/campus wide email about a staff member in the offices below mine losing a family member and for everyone to keep them in your thoughts and donate to them. Hell, I'd never even heard of the person that works downstairs.
My circle at work of anyone who knows or gives two shits about me wouldn't even fill up the seats in my compact car if I drove. But hey, I'm just there to work. I'm just the useful tool that is just the expert at her job when it suits you to give me backhanded compliments about how the place would collapse if I weren't there.
And one day I'll find a better job. I need to stick around another 4 or so years to get the full 25 years for retirement eligibility. Hell, I'm tempted to apply to a position down in Camden.